Four Year Old Firsts

It felt as though the second Jake blew out the four candles on that ferocious cheetah cake, his life began to change.

He is transitioning into this new phase of life.  One where he is developing his own interests, talents, and friendships.  I am not exactly sure how to put it into words, but little by little Jake feels less like a part of me and more and more of his own unique and autonomous person.  I know this is a process that will take years, maybe even a couple decades to complete.  But it has started...I can feel the subtle shift.  And while it breaks my heart (into a million tiny pieces) to watch my baby disappear into this "big" boy, I also can't help but be excited for as he starts on his unique journey.

In many ways, I feel like this year has had just as many firsts as his first year did.  However, instead of first words and first steps, he has moved on to first soccer goals and first violin recitals.  So here it is, another list, a list of Jacob's four year old firsts, so far...

1) I have already blogged about the first time he rode his bike without training wheels.  But it stills gets an honorable mention.  I am especially grateful it was a moment Jake could share with his Daddy just weeks before Arthur deployed.

2) Jake gave his first talk in Primary before Arthur left.  He told me he wanted to do a talk about race cars so I was so excited when we found a story in the Friend called "Cool Cars" all about sharing with one's little brother.  It was meant to be.  And then few weeks later he decided it was time bear his testimony in sacrament meeting...and then again in Primary later that same day.  The part that moved me the most is when he clearly and confidently stated, "I believe in the name of Jesus Christ."

3) Jake joined his first soccer team this fall.  After doing a couple summer camps, he was excited to play on a team.  They decided on "Space Angry Birds" as their name, and Jake and James are still doing the pregame cheer.

It was great, and really low key. Just a couple practices a week and a game of 3 on 3 or 4 on 4 with a different team each Saturday.  Robyn's favorite part was that the goals are left undefended and that the coaches actually run around on the field with their players.  My favorite part was watching Jake's caution and over analysis keep him a safe distance from the mob of kicking cleats.  The trouble is, that this generally kept him a pretty safe distance from the ball as well.

But the couple times that the ball was kicked his way, he had some pretty fancy foot work.  He even had his first break away, complete with a perfectly placed goal!  And after witnessing me cheer and almost cry, Robyn declared me an official soccer mom.

I don't know about all of that, but I was so proud of him and I think we will definitely do it again in the Spring.

4) Jake is reading his first words!  I could go on for days about all of Jake's (and James') success at home school, but I will save that for its own list.  For now I will just say that Jake has started on the road to reading and I know it will open up a whole new world for him!

5) Jake got his first filling today.  I know that sounds like a silly first to include, but he did amazing.  He was so brave, I don't think he even needed me in the room.  As the dentist leaned into numb him up, I got ready to jump up to squeeze his hand and comfort him, but he didn't even flinch.  I guess it was just a moment that caused me to sit back and take notice to what a confident and self assured boy he is becoming.  I love that he can speak for himself and that he has no difficulty articulated what he needs or how he feels, even in a situation that was new and intimidating.  I pray that this is a strength that will grow with him.

6) Jake just completed his first full semester with Ms. Robin, his violin teacher at Austin Peay.  And December 8th was his very first violin concert!!!

Obviously, this was a huge first for this year.  I was pretty confident he would be fine, but he was prefect!  The youngest by almost two years, he was a natural on that stage (I think he must have inherited that performing bug)!  He carried himself beautifully, every note in See Saw was clear, and he circled off with drama and flare.

Oh Jacob William,  you are still my cutest boy (the 1st).  It seems that before I had have even held you for the first time, people are already telling me...warning me really...about how "quickly" you would grow up.  And even though these frequent reminders got annoying, and even a little haunting, in many ways I am grateful for them.
As I have watched you grow, learn, and change this year I cannot argue that the time does go by fast...flies even.  There is hardly any more "baby" in our growing boy.  But I am lucky, because as I reflect back, I know that I didn't take any of your precious baby time for granted.  I have squeezed in as much holding and cuddling and snuggling as these years have allowed.  Even now, I love that you still find your way into my bed in the middle of every night and how you still want me to lay with you as you fall asleep.  You will always be my baby.  And I hope that as I look back at this time in your life, I will feel like we embraced this precious and exciting stage with the same fullness and joy.  We love you and are eternally grateful that you are ours.